In this talk, I explore a seldom-discussed facet of airport security: what happens after the backscatter/millimeter wave scan or the friendly TSA frisking? A marginally resourceful and MacGyver-esque individual can breeze through terminal gift shops, restaurants, magazine stands and duty-free shops to find everything they need to wage war on an airplane. We’ll take weapons — melee, ranged, and beyond — from concept to prototype in this serious (yet humorous) talk, replete with photos and video.