Volcanoes are cool and all, but will people willingly give up their privacy for the benefit of free Wi-Fi? For my 4th Grade science fair project, I skipped the erupting volcanoes and popcorn kernel-counting and instead decided to test if people cared more about their privacy or free Wi-Fi. To test this, I built a Raspberry Pi to act as a captive portal and collected statistics around town. My talk will discuss the build of the Raspberry Pi and the result I collected, along with some funny things I learned along the way.